Thursday, October 29, 2009

Okay, now THIS is ridiculous

Kona and I are at the dog park this morning, as usual, as my boy likes to “see and be seen” as they say, and as I like to get my lumpen self out of the house and among my adoring populace at least once a day. Suddenly I heart a street cleaner whirring down the street, and I look up idly only to be greeted What...the......

A street cleaner?? I yell at Ron to look up, to confirm that this is real and I’m not hallucinating, especially since it was going by so fast. Hell, if I pulled the “pink street cleaner duty” that day, I’d be zipping along mighty fast as well.

I just want to know, whose brilliant idea was this, and more importantly, who PAID for it? Me, as a taxpayer who funds the Chicago Streets and Sanitation Department? And what’s the point of it exactly? Is someone (the taxpayers?) donating a penny to “breast cancer research” for every 10 feet of street cleaned? Or is it for the ubiquitous “awareness”? Because really, nothing says mammogram like a piece of heavy machinery.

Complacent Chicago Resident #1: Hey Mabel, lookie there at that pink street cleaner! What’dya think that’s all about?
Mabel: Dunno, I hear tell people mumbling that this is cancer month or something.
CCR#1: Cancer month? Like they all want us to get cancers or like that?
Mabel: Dunno – awful lot of pink stuff in the stores though, wonder what that’s all about. Is that pink ribbon for the girls over in Iraq? Shouldn’t be over there no how.
CCR#1: Yeah, and speaking of the stores, why you keep buying everything made by that Koomen company now? Lookie, my Ho-Hos, made by these Koomen people who keep trying to cure something. What’re you tryin’ to tell me there, woman? I finished that round of antibiotics a long time ago!

Seriously, if it takes a pink street cleaner to get you to pull your head out of your ass and be “aware”, just do us all a favor and stay home. Permanently. Help us in whittling down the gene pool and all that.


t-odd said...

I'm sorry, where you ranting about something? I got distracted by the image at the top of your previous post. boobs.

the infertile breeder said...

Cleaning up cancer! I think they're really on to something.