Found it!

So you know how you were saying that you were desperately looking for more exercise equipment that would be easy on your aching joints? I mean, while I myself have not an extra ounce of fat on my lithe, lean self (hey, it's true! it’s all muscle, baby), I can sympathize with how tough it must be for someone of your, umm, “substance.”

While I’m sure the Gazelle is working wonders, I saw this and immediately thought of you:


Oh, I know the idea of twisting back and forth is probably a bit daunting for you, but I have faith that after a month or two, you’ll master it. Why, heck, since I myself know everything about everything, I’d even be happy to help you out, at least until you build up your confidence. That’s just the kind of person I am.

Then, this is what you have to look forward to:


Yes, you too will be able to stand around in your kitchen looking all manly and bare-chested, preparing a dinner that consists solely of fibrous tubers and large vegetables. Yum! Me, I’m going to add a disc to my workout routine as well, especially since I can apparently get even MORE fit and perfect merely by standing and laying around in suggestive, come hither poses while holding said disc. Hey, and I am all about bringing sexy back to working out…..